Why Are You Here Anyway?

Welcome to the Wench's World--the A2 Beer Wench to be exact. I once owned a brewery. Also once learned a lesson from that! If you've stumbled upon me, cool. What follows may or may not be directly related to real estate, the publishing biz, craft beer, Ann Arbor, or sports, but it sure will be fun and many times profane as the circumstances warrant! Enjoy (or not) at your own risk!

Tuesday, November 9, 2010

Does Being a Wench Make Me Bad?--OR Hell Yes, I'm OK and So Are You.

Being otherwise occupied with throwing open my Tap Room doors to the general public this past weekend kept me away from the first annual Beer Bloggers Conference out in Boulder.  Bummed I was, but I think The Boys would have questioned my loyalty to Our Company had I bolted to hang with the writers for the weekend.  (and of course I would not have missed this past weekend's fabulousness on West Stadium for anything!)

Turns out I missed a bit of a tiff between fellow lady beer types.  There is a contingent of us who feel that we shouldn't be calling ourselves "Beer Babes" or "Beer Bitches" or anything like "girls/chicks/ladies" and this Wench had to ponder this for a few.  The argument is that it belittles us to have to use our "sexiness" (this presupposes of course that a "bitch" or a "Wench" is sexy) or our "femaleness" to gain credibility in what is a (Make No Mistake About It People 'Cause I Know)  "man's world" of beer--be it macro, craft or the insidious evil of "macro craft."

this is MY GAL and yeah, my Art Guy gave me a  boob job but my legs are pretty damn close to these--all this lacks, The Man and I agree....foam shooting from the bottle!  Let's work on that shall we Art Guy??

I've never shied away from using my physical appeal in any job.  I work hard for this look--hours of torture in the stinky Bikram room/on the spinning bike plus daily denial of my inner Snicker's addict.  I also work hard for the knowledge I've gained from The Man and his Brewer...they've taken long hours and extreme patience with Yours Truly, making sure that since Wench has been, up until this point, the Mouthpiece, she does work from a base of knowledge.  I read, absorb, taste, discuss and read some more.  Anyone, male or female who works hard for their industry, and happens to look good going it should be able to claim whatever title they want as long as they aren't slinging anything derogatory anyone else's way.  If I call you a Wench, take it as a compliment, btw.  I earned every single second glance I get especially At My Age and love  it when I meet someone new and tell them:
"I can order my own craft brewed beer, I know what IBUs are and, oh by the way, I own a beer company."  Priceless.

I realize that beer is marketed using hot chicks, big tits, tight asses and come hither looks.  The hard sales facts are that the majority of the beer on the planet IS CONSUMED BY MEN.  Women work in the marketing departments of Bud/Miller/Coors, and while they should be awake at night over their evil plot to take away the precious little piece of market share we crafters have carved out, I don't begrudge them their shut eye over a little T&A to sell their product.  It's simple marketing people.  Men respond, being the adorable yet somewhat simple creatures that they are***, to it, and continue to purchase said Heineken or whatever swill is being peddled.  It doesn't make This Wench any angrier than having to sit through toy commercials during Sponge Bob (oh crap, the secret's out).  Just because I'm not buying it, I know the long processes of analysis that go into placing and creating the ads for it.  Bottom Line Economics, if you've never heard of it.
I am SO NOT the target audience for this...on SO MANY levels but I refuse to be insulted by it, being the blatant objectifier of man flesh that I am.

Craft Beer is NOT immune--just more cerebral!

I say, jump on the bandwagon and be sexy, proud and gorgeous in your own skin and in your well-earned knowledge of BEER.  Own it!  And let's rant instead about the REAL crimes of "macro crafts" and the egregious Lager Discrimination that is institutionalized amongst beer folk.  Stop the hating ladies.  We are all in this TOGETHER and we all are entitled to our own opinions---save the insults for the boys!  I do!  Oh, and for those of you who "dislike" my addiction to objectifying soccer players?  too bad...I say--Lighten up everybody!  Bottoms up!

and my favorite object of objectification:
Sam Who? Right Haggs? 

NOTE THIS!! We are opening LATER THAN NORMAL.  Our normal Saturday hours ARE noon-12 but this Saturday we are opening at 7 p.m.  Don't be peeking into my Tap Room at 1 p.m. all pissy 'cause I didn't warn you.  We got a Huge Ass Party to Plan and you get to reap the benefits of $1 off beers until 10, free pizza until 9 and rockin' to Matt Styles DJ from 9-whenever we collapse in heaps of beer infused happiness and I pour you into a cab and send you home.

The Ever-Naughty, Always-Entertaining, In-defense-of-beer-bitches-everywhere,
Wench (A2)
***forgot this the first time I posted but :  All the Best and most confident Alpha/Beta/Omega men I know acknowledge THIS simplicity as true fact and embrace it as such.


Beerme said...

You properly bitch-slapped those who would denigrate sexy beer wenches everywhere! Sex and beer have always been closely tied together, and will always remain so. Rave on!

TeacherPatti said...

Man this is a tough one. The problem for me is when women become objectified to the point that we are JUST tits and ass. The first thing you do to break someone down is strip away their identity. If I was about to beat up on a buncha NeoCons, it'd be easier for me to call them #145780 then to call him, say, Dick C. "Dick C" reminds me that it is a PERSON whose head I'm about to rip off. Prisoner #145780 is but a number. Yawn. Likewise, I imagine (and studies back me up on this) it's much easier to rape or beat the shit out of a pair of tits and ass than to beat a person. And if men see us just as tits and ass, bitches and ho's, well, how will we ever work together? And if you expect me, as a woman, to just be a ho or pair of tits, what happens when I reject you? Do you take what you want anyway or do you (like quite a few do) hate "all" women, become a misogynist, etc? I guess my concern is that seeing women in such a way leads some men (and women) to paint us with one brush. When we don't fall into that stereotype, problems happen.
The other thing to keep in mind is that men are NOWHERE near as peddled about as women are. Some say that is because women aren't as visual, don't want to see male bodies but I call bullshit on that. Just as I call bullshit on men who say, "I just love beautiful women!" (No, no you don't. You love to FUCK beautiful women; there's a difference). (I also call bullshit on the men who claim they just have to have their business meeting at a strip club. Really? Kill yourself cuz that's just sad, but that's another topic.)
Having said all that though, you gotta use what you got. This is what makes the situation so difficult for me. Many men ARE going to pay attention to sexy things and if you need their attention then you need to use the sexy. Once the sexy lures them in, then you can wow them with your brilliance. The problem is with the trogodytes (sp?) who ONLY see you as tits and ass and don't care about what you have to say. And that comes from the onslaught of women being objectified. All in the house that jack built.

So what to do? Strong, good, equalist dads raising strong sons would be a good start. Women not being afraid of being smart would be another good thing. Sneaking in some intelligence along with the sexy would be super too (you do this well, BW :)). What I DON'T think is constructive is for women to fight amongst ourselves like we always seem to do. (read Men, Women & Rape for a good analysis on why this is so). It's like the stupid mommy wars--the ones that sit home are all up in the shit of those who work and the ones who work are all guilted out over nonsense (SO glad I have no kids, btw). Instead of fighting each other, let's fight to make some of the above suggestions a reality. Peace out.

marie said...

Amen, sister. I did not attend #BBC10 but I did see the catfight on twitter and wast really just annoyed by it all. It kind of proves what some men say about women: that women are catty and jealous overly emotional creatures. So many women seem to be concerned that someone, somewhere is going to objectify them. Who are these big bad objectifiers and how did they get to be so powerful?! If you can hold your own in a discussion about craft brewing while wearing a bikini and 4-inch heels? More power to ya! And if that sort of thing offends you, well, you don't have to look.


Liz said...

thanks ladies! And Teacher Patti, I agree with your general, overarching theme, but think that getting bogged down in thinking showing off what ya got, mentally and physically, encourages rape is going down a dangerous path of generalization. I love you sista! Let's talk more!

Chuck V said...

Hi Beer Wench,
Interesting blog, as usual.

Every time I see an ad for beer (or anything) that includes a scantily clad woman, I think "If this product was worth a shit would they be spending money on played-out sexually suggestive marketing that targets people who's consumer buying decisions are influenced by a picture of titties?". I guess that I am just not as simple as my male brethren.

TeacherPatti said...

I probably didn't express it well. I'm more concerned with the objectification of women in general leading down a dangerous path. I don't mean to say that showing something off = someone will rape you...sorry if that's how it came out! I mean that I don't want men "just" seeing tits and ass because I think *that* can lead to a dangerous thing!

Liz said...

No Worries Teach! We all have opinions and are fully entitled to them (as long as we don't ask anyone else to pay for them which is one reason I refuse to "monetize" my blog AND as long as they don't involve insulting other people attempting to do their job unless of course they are idiots). And yes, Chuck V I do tend to generalize when it comes to men, but it's part of my charm! I truly believe that this world is a serious place, but try not to take myself that way, at least when wearing my "Wench Suit (and heels)". I am a serious marketing expert, and think very serious thoughts about my profession nearly 24/7 but this is my forum and platform for silliness disguised as seriousness! This doesn't mean "don't be serious" when it comes to my followers and their comments though. Thanks so much to all of you for being loyal followers! cheers!

Hart Johnson said...

I join the complex opinions category here. I LOVE the sexy that is also smart and equal opportunity-as you present... being lustFUL and not just trying to get attention as an object... knowing your stuff... it is why I tend to read the blogs for the wenches, tarts and sluts, but would not be remotely interested in a 'sex kitten' blog or ANY BLOG that takes a title where somebody else OWNS the blogger 'His Girl'? *GAG* I guess it goes to a self-determination thing. And honestly... if someone wanted to pay me six figures to photograph me straddling a giant beer bottle--I'm all over it.

I would AGREE though, that we need to teach sons and daughters alike the importance of the SMART part. I can't tolerate playing dumb or giving over power.

Liz said...

stay sexy ladies, and tarty, and all of the above. Don't deny your inner awesomeness which INCLUDES being smart and gorgeous and sassy and good at whatever you put your mind to, all at once!
Oh, and it would take 6 figures or a french kiss from Sam (like he means it) for me to STRADDLE that beer bottle. Note that this Wench sits sidesaddle like a lady...